UNDISCLOSED LOCATION – Humaaray pyaaray mohataram janaab (HPMJ) Hafiz Saeed saheb is fine and should not be bothered with further missed calls, messages, waves or pokes. This message was issued by HPMJ Hafiz Saeed saheb to Lt Gen (retd) Amjad Shoaib during the early hours of Thursday, hacking sources have informed The Dependent.
Messaging from an undisclosed location, which was soon to become disclosed, thanks to general concern, expressed by Lt Gen Amjad Shoaib in particular after a minor incident in Lahore on Wednesday, HPMJ Hafiz Saeed saheb told the retired general to keep his emotions under check.
“I’m fine.” texted HPMJ Hafiz Saeed at 03:21 am on Thursday, with the message immediately seen by the general who called HPMJ right away.
“Stop calling me.” texted HPMJ after disconnecting the general’s call, which had been made in addition to the 2611 missed calls that HPMJ Hafiz Saeed had received from Lt Gen (retd) Amjad Shoaib.
“Stop messaging me.” texted HPMJ after the realising that the general had started typing yet another long, suffocating, rant.
Sources privy to online communication between the two over the past two years have informed The Dependent that the general has regularly been told off by HPMJ for being too clingy, while Lt Gen Amjad Shoaib says HPMJ Hafiz Saeed is mean and heartless.
“Don’t you start crying,” typed HPMJ Hafiz Saeed at press time, before erasing the message, deciding against sending it, and muting the general’s window.
