Nation’s youth vow to observe Independence Day by removing silencer from bikes

The nation’s youth on Saturday vowed to observe and celebrate Independence Day by promptly removing silencers from their respective motorcycles.

“It is a tradition and we will like to uphold the traditions that the freedom fighters worked so hard for us to maintain,” said Kashif “Kashi” Hussain, a student in Lahore.

“We are going to remove the silencers and go for a rapid ride, on Ferozepur Road, on to Jail Road and then on to Liberty Market,” he added. “I will not let this tradition die.”

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“We will also not let other aspects of this tradition die,” said his friend Noman “Nomi” Butt. “These are the pressure horns that we use and the fire-crackers that we might be throwing inside cars that have their windows down. That, specifically, is something I have close to my heart.”

“Our evening will then conclude with us crying like 6-year-olds when the police take us into lock-up and slap us around a bit, at which point we will swear upon our grandfathers’ graves, except Kami, whose dada jaan is still around, to never display such behaviour again,” he said.

“This is our annual tradition!”

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The Dependent
The above piece is a work of satire and does not present itself as the truth.
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