New startup sells furniture, computers left over by failed startups

A new startup is banking on the model of selling the furniture, computers and office supplies of failed startups.

BrokenDreams.io, currently in its Series A funding stage, is attempting to capitalise off the large number of startups unable to sustain themselves.

“What BrokenDreams plans to do is to swoop in on these startups, even before they tank, and take stock of all of their inventory, down to the mugs and foosball tables,” said Hashim Chishti, CEO of BrokenDreams.io. “So when we can know what we’re going to buy and sell even before that particular startup CEO’s tearful all-staff address.”

- Advertisement -

“Take, for example, this startup started by LUMS kids called ScrunchyShare which they call ‘the Uber of haircare products’ whatever that means,” said Chishti. “Since we already know it’s going to fail, we’ve already taken stock of their entire inventory. (ScrunchyShare CEO) Seher’s elder brother is my friend and I feel bad about this but business is business.”

“Right now, I’m on the way to the auction of the furniture ClassFellows, a social media platform that tries to do what Facebook already does but doesn’t do it well, but somehow got funding at Plan9.”

STOP PRESS: after the filing of this news report, BrokenDreams.io was shut down by initial investors on account of ‘the very existence of Daraz and OLX,’ on which they also listed the office furniture and computers as up for sale.

- Advertisement -
The Dependent
The above piece is a work of satire and does not present itself as the truth.

LEAVE A REPLY

Please enter your comment!
Please enter your name here

- Advertisment -

Must Read

Former FATA ‘former’ in name only, TTP reassured

The seven agencies of the former Federally Administered Tribal Areas (FATA) that have been merged into the Khyber Pakhtunkhwa province as districts are “formerly”...