Even absolute idiot can head premier arts body, says motivational speaker

“Think you’re an absolute idiot? Don’t worry,” said Qasim Ali Shah, a motivational speaker to a packed hall at the Al Hamra Arts Council. “One day even you can become the chief of a place like this venue.”

“Even an absolute idiot, yes,” he repeated for dramatic effect. “Even an absolute idiot.”

The motivational speaker then said that they’re is nothing you cannot achieve in this life if you set your mind to it. “If you want a job, you shouldn’t think of the competition,” he said. “And most of all, you shouldn’t think about whether or not you deserve it.”

“I wanted to be a model once, I wanted to be a singer once, I wanted to be a fighter pilot once,” he said. “Have I let those dreams go? No. I can still achieve them.”

“Yes, yes, I know the maximum age to apply to the airforce in Pakistan is 21 years. So what? I can be 21 again.”

“I also want to do my BA from Lahore College of Women,” he said. “And I will.”

The Dependent
The above piece is a work of satire and does not present itself as the truth.

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